《衬衫领子》，1848 年
the Shirt-collar, 1848
从前有一位讲究的绅士，他除了别的东西之外，还有一个脱靴器和一把梳子；但他还有世上最精致的衬衫领子，关于这个领子，我们马上就要听一个故事了。
there was once a fine gentleman who possessed among other things a boot-jack and a hair-brush; but he had also the finest shirt-collar in the world, and of this collar we are about to hear a story.
这个领子已经很旧了，以至于他开始考虑结婚的事；有一天，他碰巧和一条袜带在同一个洗衣盆里。
the collar had bee so old that he began to think about getting married; and one day he happened to find himself in the same washing-tub as a garter.
“说真的，” 衬衫领子说，“我以前从没见过这么纤细、这么精致、这么整洁、这么柔软的东西。我可以冒昧地问一下你的名字吗？”
“Upon my word,” said the shirt-collar, “I have never seen anything so slim and delicate, so neat and soft before. may I venture to ask your name?”
“我不会告诉你的。” 袜带回答道。
“I shall not tell you,” replied the garter.
“你在家的时候住在哪儿呢？” 衬衫领子问道。但袜带生性害羞，不知道该怎么回答这样的问题。
“where do you reside when you are at home?” asked the shirt-collar. but the garter was naturally shy, and did not know how to answer such a question.
“我猜你是一条腰带，” 衬衫领子说，“一种衬腰带。我看出来了，我的小女士，你既实用又美观。”
“I presume you are a girdle,” said the shirt-collar, “a sort of under girdle. I see that you are useful, as well as ornamental, my little lady.”
“你别和我说话，” 袜带说，“我觉得我可没给过你这样做的任何鼓励。”
“You must not speak to me,” said the garter; “I do not think I have been given you any encouragement to do so.”
“哦，当一个人长得像你这么漂亮的时候，” 衬衫领子说，“这难道还不够鼓励吗？”
“oh, when any one is as beautiful as you are,” said the shirt-collar, “is not that encouragement enough?”
“走开；别靠我这么近，” 袜带说，“在我看来，你就跟个男人似的。”
“Get away; don’t e so near me,” said the garter, “you appear to me quite like a man.”
“我当然是一位讲究的绅士，” 衬衫领子说，“我有一个脱靴器和一把梳子。” 这不是真的，因为这些东西是他主人的；但他是个爱吹牛的家伙。
“I am a fine gentleman certainly,” said the shirt-collar, “I possess a boot-jack and a hair-brush.” this was not true, for these things belonged to his master; but he was a boaster.
“别靠我这么近，” 袜带说，“我不习惯这样。”
“don’t e so near me,” said the garter; “I am no accustomed to it.”
“装腔作势！” 衬衫领子说。
“Affectation!” said the shirt-collar.
然后它们从洗衣盆里被拿了出来，上了浆，挂在椅子上晒在阳光下，接着又被放在熨衣板上。
then they were taken out of the wash-tub, starched, and hung over a chair in the sunshine, and then laid on the ironing-board.
现在烧热的熨斗来了。
And now came the glowing iron.
“寡妇夫人，” 衬衫领子说，“小寡妇夫人，我觉得好暖和呀。我在变化，我所有的褶子都没了。你在我身上烫出个洞了。哎呀！我向你求婚。”
“mistress widow,” said the shirt-collar, “little mistress widow, I feel quite warm. I am changing, I am losing all my creases. You are burning a hole in me. Ugh! I propose to you.”
“你这块破布，” 熨斗骄傲地在领子上压过，因为她自认为是一台蒸汽机，在铁轨上行驶并拉着车厢。“你这块破布！” 她说。
“You old rag,” said the flat-iron, driving proudly over the collar, for she fancied herself a steam-engine, which rolls over the railway and draws carriages. “You old rag!” said she.
衬衫领子的边缘有点磨损了，于是拿来剪刀把它们剪齐。
the edges of the shirt-collar were a little frayed, so the scissors were brought to cut them smooth.
“哦！” 衬衫领子叫道，“你会成为多么出色的舞者啊；你的腿能伸得那么好。我从没见过这么迷人的；我敢肯定没有人类能做到同样的事。”
“oh!” exclaimed the shirt-collar, “what a first-rate dancer you would make; you can stretch out your leg so well. I never saw anything so charming; I am sure no human being could make the same.”
“我想也不会。” 剪刀回答道。
“I should think not,” replied the scissors.
“你应该成为一位伯爵夫人，” 衬衫领子说；“但我所拥有的全部家当就是一位讲究的绅士、一个脱靴器和一把梳子。我真希望能有一份产业送给你。”
“You ought to be a countess,” said the shirt collar; “but all I possess consists of a fine gentleman, a fine gentleman, a boot-jack, and a b. I wish I had an estate for your sake.”
“什么！他要向我求婚？” 剪刀说，她变得非常生气，以至于剪衬衫领子的时候下手太重了，结果这领子只好因为没用而被扔掉了。
“what! is he going to propose to me?” said the scissors, and she became so angry that she cut too sharply into the shirt collar, and it was obliged to be thrown by as useless.
“我得向梳子求婚了，” 衬衫领子想；于是有一天他说，“我的小女士，你有一头多么漂亮的头发呀。你从来没想过订婚的事吗？”
“I shall be obliged to propose to the hair-brush,” thought the shirt collar; so he remarked one day, “It is wonderful what beautiful hair you have, my little lady. have you never thought of being engaged?”
“你应该知道我是会考虑这事的，” 梳子回答道，“我已经和脱靴器订婚了。”
“You might know I should think of it,” answered the hair brush; “I am engaged to the boot-jack.”
“订婚了！” 衬衫领子叫道，“现在都没人可求婚了；” 然后他就假装看不起所有的谈情说爱。
“Engaged!” cried the shirt collar, “now there is no one left to propose to;” and then he pretended to despise all love-making.
过了很长时间，衬衫领子被装在一个袋子里送到了造纸厂。
A long time passed, and the shirt collar was taken in a bag to the paper-mill.
这里有一大群破布，好的破布单独放在一边，和粗糙的破布分开，就该这样。
here was a large pany of rags, the fine ones lying by themselves, separated from the coarser, as it ought to be.
它们都有很多事可讲，尤其是衬衫领子，他可真是个爱吹牛的家伙。
they had all many things to relate, especially the shirt collar, who was a terrible boaster.
“我有过无数的风流韵事，” 衬衫领子说，“没人让我消停过。我确实是个非常讲究的绅士；相当傲慢。我有一个脱靴器和一把梳子，可我从来没用过。你们真该看看我当年被拒绝时的样子。我永远也忘不了我的初恋；她是一条腰带，那么迷人、精致、柔软，还为了我跳进了洗衣盆。还有一个寡妇，她热烈地爱着我，但我不理她，结果她变得黑乎乎的。接下来的那个是个一流的舞者；她给我留下了至今还在疼的伤口，她太热情了。就连我自己的梳子都爱上了我，因为被忽视的爱情，她的头发都掉光了。是的，我在这方面有很丰富的经历，但我最大的悲痛是为了那条袜带 —— 我是说腰带 —— 她跳进了洗衣盆。我心里有很大的愧疚，真的是时候该把我变成白纸了。”
“I have had an immense number of love affairs,” said the shirt collar, “no one left me any peace. It is true I was a very fine gentleman; quite stuck up. I had a boot-jack and a brush that I never used. You should have seen me then, when I was turned down. I shall never forget my first love; she was a girdle, so charming, and fine, and soft, and she threw herself into a washing tub for my sake. there was a widow too, who was warmly in love with me, but I left her alone, and she became quite black. the next was a first-rate dancer; she gave me the wound from which I still suffer, she was so passionate. Even my own hair-brush was in love with me, and lost all her hair through neglected love. Yes, I have been had great experience of this kind, but my greatest grief was for the garter — the girdle I meant to say — that jumped into the wash-tub. I have a great deal on my conscience, and it is really time I should be turned into white paper.”
衬衫领子最后就落得了这样的下场。
And the shirt collar came to this at last.
所有的破布都被制成了白纸，而衬衫领子就变成了我们现在看到的这张纸，这个故事就印在这张纸上。
All the rags were made into white paper, and the shirt collar became the very identical piece of paper which we now see, and on which this story is printed.
这是对他的一种惩罚，因为他对那些不真实的事情大肆吹嘘，实在是太过分了。
It happened as a punishment to him, for having boasted so shockingly of things which were not true.
这对我们是一个警示，要注意自己的行为，因为说不定哪天我们自己也会被扔进破布袋，然后被制成白纸，我们的整个经历，甚至是最隐秘的行为，都可能被写在上面。
And this is a warning to us, to be careful how we act, for we may some day find ourselves in the rag-bag, to be turned into white paper, on which our whole history may be written, even its most secret actions.
而且要是不得不以一张纸的形式在世上流传，把我们做过的所有事情都讲出来，就像那个爱吹牛的衬衫领子一样，那可就不愉快了。
And it would not be pleasant to have to run about the world in the form of a piece of paper, telling everything we have done, like the boasting shirt collar.